Interesting thoughts

Family guy should have hidden a bunch of different kids that looked like Quagmire in each episode.
 
Bodies are weird. I can run, jump, wakeboard, do cartwheels, play piano, and type 90 words per minute, but if I brush my teeth with the wrong hand it's like time slows down while my brain tries to process what the actual hell is going on
 
Whenever I fuck up bad, I just remember that somewhere, an ant just brought borax laced food back to his queen and killed his entire family.
 
If you’re no longer covered by your parent’s health insurance, your manufacturer’s warranty is over.
 
Why does my brain assume that new gadgets are delicate but as they get older they become stronger
 
Task Manager should have an "End as many tasks as possible without crashing my system" button
 
If you had $1 for every year the universe has existed (approximately 13.8 billion years). You wouldn't even make the top 50 on the Forbes list.
 
Whether you're a woman or a straight man, taking a bra off is likely to be one of the high points of your day.
 
Sleeping mechanisms should be changed. Like "Oh, you got 20 hours of sleep today? Cool man, you don't need sleep for the next three days."
 
Popping bubblewrap is not as fun when you realise that you are releasing toxic Chinese air into your home one cubic centimeter at a time.
 
When I binge watch tv shows, I realized I'm watching actors live a fake life while I sit and waste my real one away
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top Bottom