Interesting thoughts

[Mave]

Sleeping in is considered lazy, but going to bed early is not.

 

[Mave]

If you attempt to rob a bank you won't have any trouble with rent/food bills for the next 10 years whether you are successful or not

 

[Mave]

Girl Scouts is basically a brand-name cookie company that gets away with child labor.

 

[Stybar]

At some point in the future, when people show pictures of their ancestors, they won't be grainy sepia photographs, they will be HD selfies from their Facebook profiles

"This was granny at the state fair, this was granny at the state fair as well, and this was granny 5 seconds later at the state fair,..."
and
"This was grandpa on the night he met grandma. Oh, I remember it well, we were both so completely wasted, and she grinded on me for like a full 10 minutes before we snuck into the bathroom and made your father"

 

[Mave]

At some point in the future, when people show pictures of their ancestors, they won't be grainy sepia photographs, they will be HD selfies from their Facebook profiles

"This was granny at the state fair, this was granny at the state fair as well, and this was granny 5 seconds later at the state fair,..."
and
"This was grandpa on the night he met grandma. Oh, I remember it well, we were both so completely wasted, and she grinded on me for like a full 10 minutes before we snuck into the bathroom and made your father"

Dear God...



If dentists make their money from unhealthy teeth, why would i trust a product that 9/10 of them recommend?

 

[Mave]

Ironically, eating something on a stick prevents you from getting sticky.

 

[Mave]

Restaurants should put the Wi-Fi password on their menu.

 

[Mave]

Everything sounds four times as powerful with the word "industrial" placed in front of it. Industrial steel. Industrial engineering. Industrial revolution. Industrial power metal. Industrial accident.

 

[Mave]

The classic ipod is easier to use than the current iphone music app.

 

[Mave]

"The Voice" UK would be so much better if the judges turned their chair away if they didn't like the person.

 

[Mave]

I wonder if the iceberg that sank the titanic still exists

 

[Mave]

If I was transported to the 1800's I would probably be a better doctor with no actual training than actual doctors of that time.

 

[Mave]

I'm wealthier than Kanye West.

 

[Mave]

"You're not alone" can either be the most comforting thing to hear, or the scariest, depending on the situation.

 

[Mave]

Bragging about how much alcohol you can drink is like saying 'Look how much I can poison myself without it affecting me negatively'

 

[Mave]

An airbag is like Schrödinger's cat, it both works and doesn't work at the same time until you crash and find out.

 

[Mave]

Instead of a "daddy", the male equivalent of a cougar should be called a MANTHER

 

[Mave]

Snowmobile engines should be rated in dogpower.

 

[Mave]

"One man's junk is another man's treasure" needs to be put on a nice big sign at a pride parade.

 

[Mave]

When a DJ has turntables, he's making music from scratch.