Creativity

[SovareZza]

So, TMS, I want your opinion on something that I don't usually show to anyone (except my English teacher in year 10). I want you guys to give me your opinions on two poems that I have written - I wrote one tonight and the other one 3 - 4 years ago.

Oh, and just for the fuck of it, try and guess which one I wrote when I was 14-15. Here goes.

When we utter words
Do we understand their meaning?
Or are they just used meaninglessly?
For those who don't be thorough
Shall their fate be decided fair?

I like to think this world spins
On an axis largely unknown
It gives me thought and knowledge
Or does it just fill my head?

Tell me why this world is wrong
And all that exists has its own place
Expand your understanding and view on life
Or humanity shall be broken
Further to the point of extinction

Is the human race irreplaceable?
Can anything even comprehend what we've done?
I doubt this thought
But there always shall be doubt
I just wonder why?

Nightfall, moonrise
I can see the beauty in your eyes
The day is sleeping, now the night beckons
We all see the beauty of the heavens

Falling hard, falling true
All my love I gave to you
Please now sleep or hear my pain
I stop this feeling every day

Don't you cry, wipe away those tears
All built up from over the years
Now you're gone yet I'm still here
Life without you means I have no fear

You may be gone but soon we'll meet
When I'm on the ground at their feet
And when I fly there's no goodbye
Just eternity of you & I

So yeah, what'd you think?

 

[Nimphiouus]

First one you wrote when you were 15 because it doesn't rhyme.

Second one is good.